[ cliffs notes...??!? ]

went to see 'Donnie Darko: Directors Cut'...and...IT FUCKING BLOWS BIG GOAT ASS LIKE A FRIGGIN TEENAGE PROM QUEEN!!!...its donnie darko, for dummies...yes, thats my new catch-phrase...if you try to use it you must pay me a million dollar$

[odius]
spinning vinyl in my dome-top cranial cavity; errantly depressed about the state of the nation; hung-out on clothes lines through the worse storm on record; dragged 60-miles behind a car in high-speed-pursuit of a california dream...
passionate about minor, she says trivial, -things; likened to celebrity impersonators; swirled down the toilet...
color my cancer; i'll paint your wings
burn for an answer; to trivial things...

weekly horror-scope
It is time to take a rest. You benefit by thinking seriously about what you want to do and why. On Tuesday Venus sextiles Mars, and this encourages you to apply a spiritual solution to a career issue with positive results. You will succeed in ways that you had not thought possible. But the presence of Jupiter and Mercury in your sign are giving you an advantage, even if you are unable to be quite as effective as usual. Your optimism is doing wonderful things for you behind you back.

compromise
no no there's nobody new; these streets look the same; but when i close my eyes i see daisy's and hot, home-made-apple-pie; dont go if you feel like it; im hardly awake tonight...

i wont kill myself over thoughts of regret; i dont measure up to the gross national debt; and so what if i get stupid over grrrls; im not even sure but she makes me feel stoopid tonight...

i wont stay awake
spill my bottle where i lay
and dream myself into decadent sleep

bashful

i can not apologize; this sinful view that coincides; desperation, wildflower; morning glory with a taste gone sour...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

im looking up as if in a dream, under water; a feeling i thought i once killed; bash the brains of another idea; with crimson flow and mine eyes aglow...this could get scary.
mother, your baby's crying...
lover, your love is dying...
all these obese adolesent pygmy addicts; one more time--- thats it, ive had it!; paint the view you'd rather see; doesnt mean that much to me...this could get scary.
under the red roof grinding...
teenage lust, keep on trying...
almost there, you see they made it; almost a care, like others fake it; lean the line and skim the prophet's; why unjust? 'cause god's a puppet...
running for that big machine...
close your eyes...
it was only a dream.

[junky]
ive got a voice; or what passes for one in life today. helped myself to a slice of the sidewalk to peddle my wares; so what if my "soap-box" has a login name and password?! i get that warm whiskey-glow feeling when set it down. seeing those pixels blink to life as if actually being born to stand in my sentence; to be part of my devious plot. just supposing that it does; where is the harm in that? my creating and then birthing a thought into electronic prose...? so what if i dont like the government, who cares that i am insulted by my representation therein? ...has this mutinious crowd forced a reaction? who controls who; the bull? or the matador? for while the bull charges blind with fury [only because his huevos have been severly lasso'd and yanked; yikes!] the matador must still move to avoid being skewred like a marshmellow

mmmm s'mores!

fill in the blank

spiral through till we're down to earth
a different time could show my worth
a feeding mind that feeds the worms
the horrid gasp as her love has turned...

fill in the blank and i'll fill you in
a passionate love addicted to sin

ROTF - LMAO

Check THIS out

i actually turned this in to my skool

Experience with Teams
Brian Drummy
University of Phoenix
Group SV04ICS01
SOC/110 – Teamwork, Collaboration, and Conflict Resolution
Dennis Golden
June 23, 2004


The Groups I don’t Belong To
I exist in a weird social nexus of required, but forced, sociability and my preference of solitude. I work in a social environment: in a small, quaint, little coffeehouse in San Clemente, Ca. But the show of ‘social-butterfly’ is a manifestation of my need to earn wages and easy to do because the interactions are short and with purpose. The other employee’s and I have a strained relationship because I was hired-in over them. We see each other in passing and never hold non-work related conversations. I also perform music on-stage but I play alone and it is more a ‘show’ than anything else is is. Fortunately it is one that enjoy.
Me, myself, and I
I laid out several goals not too long ago, some short-term and one long-term. The short-term goals were to complete my agonizingly slow ascension towards a Degree; also, to complete and implement my business plan to open my own coffee-shop/lounge. My only long-term goal is to enjoy life while I still live and to bare no regret on my death. I am getting a little long in the tooth. I am not a spring chicken any more. There are certain things that have to be done. The focus of this group, me-myself-and-I, is to see to ALL these goals through completion.
No Two Minds About It
‘I’ assumed the role of Presidency of this council. The role of Secretary was given to ‘me’. And the last thing everyone agreed on was to give the role of Treasurer to ‘myself’. We never get anywhere near an agreement. ‘I’ totally stopped talking to ‘myself’ during the last meeting. But ‘I’ took several good measures such as enrolling in University of Phoenix. But with crazy, abnormal events constantly happening to ‘me’ and the way ‘I’ always differ ‘myself’ It is difficult going but we all strive to achieve.
Late Night Occurrence’s
‘We’, the members of Me, Myself and I, LLC; meet regularly during late night insomnia sessions. ‘We’ are all insomniacs, and I’m sure the late-night arguing did nothing to help that. “We’ would, and still do, sit for hours at night, and every so now and then ‘we’ actually get something positive accomplished. ‘I’ always started with open discussion but said little after that. And then ‘I’ would not even vote on accords. Weekly we develop ‘To Do’ lists and generally get them done. The groups over-all function would improve drastically if “we’ were not so pig-headed.
A Whole New Me, -Myself, and I; LLC
First I would give all the judgement and ultimate authority to ‘me’. Then ‘I’ would be left alone to be more of a ‘free-range’ thinker. Then ‘I’ would have to fire ‘myself’ for always being drunk and disorderly, of coarse. And with this one foul swoop the team would instantaneously be less burdened by 1/3! Productivity would increase by more than half! ‘I’ never liked ‘myself’ and would be glad to do it.
Rules and Regulations
‘We’ set down weekly ‘To Do’ lists every Sunday night. This list is to be in accordance with the original two short-term and the lone long-term goals. These are followed by nightly discussion on what was accomplished and the list is revised, often several times by ‘me’ alone. The list is to be completed by Friday night. With our mutual workweek ending, generally, on Thursday’s, this allows us to have one full day to get things done. Wednesdays and Mondays are primarily occupied with school with Thursday and Sunday nights being devoted to practice with music. Often one thing spills into the next and work is of late intruding into areas where it mustn’t, like school. But ‘we’ have taken measures to correct this. ‘I’ will find a new job.
The End?
As the end is no where near, hopefully; ‘we’ cannot be certain of success. But the necessary measures have been taken as ‘we’ see fit towards our final objectives. The final say in the matter is up to ‘me’. ‘I’ will get us there by firing ‘myself’ and getting employment more stable, and less prone to flooding. Studying at the University of Phoenix has helped foster other relationships, but ridiculous circumstances have seen those desolve as most do. ‘I’ will join a new team every class to help ‘me’ deal with socializing by shortening the relationships. ...I know this paper is not exactly what is called for on the work sheet. But after an honest look at ‘myself’, I found no real social interaction worth mentioning. What ‘I’ lacks in knowledge, ‘I’ makes up for in creativity…?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you

you make me wink; you make me smile
you know the things i try to hide
you may be passion; you think im prude
you come in here i come unglued
you hold my hand; your tie me up
' stare back at me when we make love...

got all these questions...
...you gotta believe me...
its the difference...
...you gotta believe me!!!

[humm]

you grab my ass; you have beautiful eyes
you seem to love me to my surprise
you push me back; you toy with me
you fill my head with real-life dreams
you think im funny; you say im not
you helped me find what Love i'd lost...

smooth criminal, etc., etc...
okay she moves me; but i like it best that way; she never tells but for a moment; she cant help but to move me; she doesnt know her shame...

dont ask me for her name
she knows who i am
dont tell me that again
we are never apart...

she is standing in the back now; look out my way; im standing here in the spotlight; so she will notice me...

dont you do that just for me
i do cause of need
you could be my better half
and they wont tear us apart...

quote of the day
The fortune which nobody sees makes a person happy and unenvied.
~Francis Bacon~

wilde oscar
1. Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get
married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've
lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."

3. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender
says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

4. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was salted.
A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says,
"Sorry we don't serve food in here."

5. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

6. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under
his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

7. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the
other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

8. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass
of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?" "It! 's Not Unusual."

9. Two cows standing next to each other in a field,
Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," said Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaimed Daisy.

10. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The
kids were nothing to look at either.

11. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull
before.

12. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says,
"My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?"
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up and ! examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy."

13. Apparently, one in five people in the world are
Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or my dad, or maybe my older brother Colin or my y! ounger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I'm pretty sure it's Colin.

14. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other
day but I couldn't find any.

15. I went to the butcher's the other day and I bet
him 50 bucks that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.
He said, "No, the steaks are too high."

16. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious
accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!"
The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off
your arms!"

17. I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled
a mussel.

18. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but
when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving that you can't
have your kayak and heat it too.

19. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

20. Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the
BAR TENDER here?"

Quote of the Week

"Why do you think Uranus felt pain when he realized his reign was over?"
~Retold Classic Myths; The Perfection Form Company (1990)~

California History

Do you know what happened this week back in 1850?

California became a state.
The state had no electricity.
The state had no money.
Almost everyone spoke Spanish.
There were gun fights in the streets.

So basically, it was just like California is today,
only the women had real boobs.

nocturnal-urination -nation
in a vague summer night's worst nightmare, speculate this: he who'so ever pulleth this sword from this stone shall be forwith rightful king of all England---does this seem MAD to anyone else?

chronologically gifted


If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

BUT

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work
and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's
the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top

the kewlest thing since play-doh

CLICK HERE

a playground thing...

hang around the playground through sunsets/sunrise; taking up the weekend..,could take all night; say it aint so and put on fake feelings; dashboard indebted to the imprint of my brow FOR MY DIRTY PIGEONS...

Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of May 10 through May 16

Mercury makes a great aspect to Venus on Monday, so make use of this to negotiate some wonderful deals with all the right people. You gain special favor with those in positions of power and authority. You are able to charm them with your style, flair, and know-how, and your meticulous attention to detail. Pull out all the stops, and go straight for the big prize. Mars has now joined Saturn in Cancer, so your social life should begin to pick up, after a period in which is has seemed a bit dull.

The Guys' Rules

We always hear "the rules" from the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!
Please note ... each is numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl.
If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining
about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going
to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable
answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem
only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months
is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago
is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become
null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls,
don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something
or tell us how you want it done. Not both.
If you already know best how to do it,
just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever
you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions
and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors,
like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying,
but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere,
absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless
you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball,
the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know,
I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that?
It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can -
to give them a bigger laugh!!

bored and lonely and a little bit scared
here is exactly what is needed for those with too much time on thier hands {administration-whores and bitch-clerks; data-entry-scum and mail-room-morons...i too slaved under the flickering phosphorescent lights of corporate america, mindlessly stabbing at a keyboard...i spent about 15% of my day doing actual work, the rest looking for stupid shit LIKE THIS

okay, so im a little bit crazy...
i took some personality disorder -test...some wierd site i found on google...what do you think? i want to know

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Very High
Schizoid:	High
Schizotypal:	Very High
Antisocial:	High
Borderline:	Very High
Histrionic:	Very High
Narcissistic:	Very High
Avoidant:	Very High
Dependent:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of May 3 through May 9

There is a Full Moon in Scorpio on Tuesday, which is going to make matters appear more emotional than they might really be. Jupiter turns direct in your sign, which brings you more opportunities, but this week it might be better to hold off, as the Sun also squares Neptune. There is a possibility of confusion, especially if signing a legal paper associated with your job. Your love life continues to be as bizarre as ever, and this keeps you on your toes. If you watch and wait, you will learn a lot.

pepsi generation and d-generates

The National Hip-Hop Generation Political Something-Or-Other is looking for volunteers for any of you hep-cat-quasi-political-freedom-fighters...check it out...

...ya' gall-darn' hooligan!...

i saw the funniest thing on craigslist.org today...in the LA section...listed between: "Film Promotion Girl Needed (One Night Only) (Hollywood) " and " Acting Academy - Director (Lake Arrowhead, CA)...check it out....


AMMEDED 22JUN2004://

THE ABOVE LINK WAS 'REMOVED FROM THE CRAIGSLIST COMMUNITY'...

hahahahaha thats some funny shit...

final note on dirty pigeons [here anyway...]

DIRTY PIGEONS!?!

on the subject of health...
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

purrty...

check this out

you said it, white boy...

The pathos of man is that he hungers for personal fulfillment and for a sense of
community with others.
~J. Saunders Redding~

dirty pigeons

...i played tonight at Coconuts in capo beach...neil of ' a white wall advertisement' joined for a few old tunes like "matted{formatted to fit this screen}" and "be cool"...jd of 'stereophonics', avowed number-one-fan of my old band, '...one man out...' stepped up as well on "in my side" and "my emily"...

...all and all a good show...possible cinco de mayo gig w/ black-flys as result...plus an open invitation to Coconuts...

...to all the entities who came in support, some unseen for literally years...my hat is off to you. thank you for making me blush :P

##########

'dirty pigeon' website coming soon...w/ mp3's!

Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of April 26 through May 2

The Sun in Taurus is helping you to appreciate how much you have to gain by thinking big. Don't downsize yourself, and focus on how tiny you want your world to be. Allow yourself to expand. On Wednesday, the Sun aspects both Saturn and Jupiter. You will feel inclined to be more sparing with time you give to your social life. But you are encouraged to be more self-expressive than you usually are. This is a good week, with the promise of progress, as Mercury, your ruling planet, turns direct.

sunrise in tijuana
now take a minute, there...dont be so damned naive; ' think this is something you really should come down and see; i walk a mile but i didnt find a thing; saw the sky and it was whistling to me...singin'...
just a little south of the southern most edge; smells like shit, well...i think that somebody did; the asshole of the earth is all around me; but that sun-rise sky...so beautiful...my hearts pounding...those silver-laced slivers of clouds...touched in pink-orange nouns...so beautiful...so beautiful...

in the town where you dont wanna drink the water
yeah, i saw the prettiest sun-rise in tijuana...

Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of April 19 through April 25

There is a Solar Eclipse in a very sensitive part of your chart. This has to do with shared finances, loans, credit, and also with those deep one-to-one bonds that you have with others. It will take you to some very profound places inside yourself, and also inside others, as you will have a lot more insight than usual. But for the time being, at the start of the week you should take things a little more easy than normal. There could be some surprising happenings. Be ready for the unexpected.

the magic is you...

check'a'dis'a'one'time'boiiiiii:

the incredible Corn Mo'

november rain
When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same

'Cause nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain

We've been through this auch a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain

But lovers always come and lovers always go
An no one's really sure who's lettin' go today
Walking away

If we could take the time
to lay it on the line
I could rest my head
Just knowin' that you were mine
All mine
So if you want to love me
then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin'
In the cold November rain

Do you need some time...on your own
Do you need some time...all alone
Everybody needs some time...
on their own
Don't you know you need some time...all alone

I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you

Sometimes I need some time...on my
own
Sometimes I need some time...all alone
Everybody needs some time...
on their own
Don't you know you need some time...all alone

And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness
We still can find a way
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
Even cold November rain

Don't ya think that you need somebody
Don't ya think that you need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

my plastic rose garden
so tell me its not ugly; that you think its just lovely...in your curt, up-right-mammal fashion; so gloriously done-up with self-righteous indignation---i can picture that scowl, feeling elevation.
why dont the things i see in my head match with whats before my eyes?
and everytime this happens, a little piece of me dies?

#############

shhh!...can you hear it?...the sound of nervous silence...

a brave new whirl
sit back, listen to the sunshine; take time, all your life is waiting; head strong, pull out to the real world; look back, boy you barely knew her...

...and i wont think of ways to fly; not today, no, not today; cuz right now i think that i; can be okay, be okay...

short lived, adolescent feelings; taste good, woke up on the ceiling; talk trash, wasted words of rubbish; stop and, wonder why they've done this...

...so what if i wont die; not today, no, not today; sometimes i think that i; can be okay, it'll be okay . . .

all these pictures
...moving pictures
seem so different
...almost distant...
i wont miss this
...not my business
catch a dream...make believe...

oh la la...
gasping breath...
...mouth to ear
a gentle moan...
...all you hear.

Hello Virgo
Weekly Horror-scope:

Mercury continues to be retrograde, which is putting a monkey wrench in the works. You need to believe that it is all for the best. Early on in the week, it moves into Aries, and this emphasizes your relationship to power, and also to shared finances. You may find that you have to go over old ground when it comes to loan payments or credit schemes. Mars and Venus continue to move through Gemini, stirring up your career options and making you believe that you can do it, whatever "it" is.

premature emasculation
in a dream i can hardly remember; her smell, her touch, her taste; bubble gum and tangerine skies; so much for this tuesday of wasted wet dreams; my punchbowl narcotic life-style; i am truely a fiend; like an old polaroid snap-shot that triggers no memories; but i know that it happened...that boy in the picture---so faded---thats me; cheecks sunken in, eyes open wide; and the grrrl of my heart stands at my side...

fawkin' hell
To make pleasures pleasant, shorten them.
~Charles Buxton~

one arm tied behind my back

i have a couple things to post and dont feel like separating them so:


to my love from firenze; please dont let this love end
i'll bribe angels or gods to win back your heart
i love you and feel it in the tiny quarks that make cells...
that make up all the fucked up peices of me...
but you said you loved me, i know it was true
please try to forgive as i have and would you...
put it behind, chalk it up to the past
i want yours to be the face, and the voice i hear last...
tell me you hate me, call me names in languages i cant understand
but atleast let me know youre okay; still breathe; or demand-
that i come to you right now, this very week
pick you up in cab and sweep you up of your feet
carry you away to live out as one
let all this be over and our new life just begun;

####RCVD XMSN::::::
...i have begun recording {for all you horny ghosts out there} again...under the name 'dirty pigeons'...my fetish with monkeys has been replaced with birds...after a brief exploit at life in The City, and finding it lacking in civility...i have re-focused myself into readying a new release...a working title is "bi-polar-manic-insomniac, seeks same; must have own drum-set; snorkle a plus"...a bit long but we'll see...
...so having returned to the now infamous OC, the county hated my millions, worshipped by many, and is itself another cog in the great life-eating machinery...i have tooled around with evan and neil of "a white-wall advertisement"...a couple of ghetto fabulous rappers from miami named 'Freeze' and 'Ski-Mask'...who kicked out some mean rhymes...a debut show is in the works at AAA ELEKTRA Co-Op Art museum in orange...more to follow...and i can be occasionally found monday nights at kelly mcCue's in mission potatoe, off los alisos past jeronimo...keep the name radiation-burned into what passes as a cerbrum in your neaderthal-like cranium...or better yet, write it down...anywhere...everywhere..."dirty pigeons will shit on your head" ...get a sharpie and go for a walk...send me a pic of a public exhibition like this and you will win a free dirty pigeons t-shirt, stickers, used condoms, and all sorts of goodies...maybe even free tickets to the up-coming CD release party {if my psychotic-perfectionist-tendancies dont mutilate this release like all the others}...cross your fingers...take a deep breath...count to ten...fondle yourself as needed to alleviate stress...

...keep checking here for more 'dirty pigeons' news updates/info

-bd

###XMIT END::::::

"i get up when i want, except on thursdays when i get rudely awakened my the gas man; i get out of bed, put my trousers on, and i THINK about leaving me house...
...johns got thru and thru; he gets intimidated by the dirty pigeons, they love a bit of him...
...i feed the squirels, i sometimes feed the sparrows too; it gives me an enormous sense of well-being; and then im happy for the rest of the day; safe in the knowledge there will always be a bit of my heart devoted to it..."

"you should cut down on your park-life, boy...get some exorcise..."

"all the people, so many people; and they all go 'round and 'round all day; park-life"


no feelings were hurt in the making of this message

too much of a good thang'
i could have an evil, but i kept up the streak;walking past people, only seeing their feet; never seen a face, i dont even see me; stab at an arm with a tongue in your cheek...
pompous... fascist... freak

bad ideas...a dirty arm...ask how'd we end up like this...wasnt doing no harm...


**neil...email me C L I C K H E R E to be Dean Moriarty

Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of April 5 through April 11

Mercury turns direct on Tuesday, and this may hold things up for some weeks to come. You love to be organized, but may have to be content to go with the flow and get used to unusual happenings that will bring you interesting results. The power of synchronicity could be very noticeable. But it won't be a good idea to buy or sign anything of major importance. It's better to wait until Mercury is back on track once again. You can finish off your unfinished business though, with real success.

cant be held accountable

flying high on an airplane again
cigarette shakes in my hand
i cant believe what They said...
told that damn lie again
told us a lie and it true
so played out for you
tear at the wires all the time
but it just keeps coming out...

can i drift with you tonite
on these could-be-clouds around me
would you tell her that i said its alright
alright...
alright now,
-

spent all last night
in the terminal-lounge
just me and this guy on a pill that he found
playing for the empty halls
playing just to make some noise
playing cause theres nothing else to do...

if i cant be held accountable
id like to drift tonite
on these would-be-could-be clouds around me
she says that its alright
alright...
all right.

nifty
>Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe and the biran fguiers it out aynawy. . WOW!

Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of March 29 through April 4

Your thoughts are on the deep emotional bonds you share, as well as your joint finances. But right now there is nothing too worrying to have to contend with. You might have to take care on Thursday, when the Sun sextiles Neptune, as you will be more out of touch with reality than usual. Don't make any snap decisions regarding your job, without checking in on others and their ideas first. Mercury moves into Taurus, which is for business trips, and for getting your point across in novel situations.

a question to me friendster
couldnt i love you just the way you are...? so many years now i'd look forward to getting to know you all over again...if offered a chance---will she give me that second glance?...sounded offended when you returned my last call...you know how i hate valentine's...and yes i still get so drunk i pass out in the street, or on a front porch...would you mind if it was yours?...it takes a little longer, my body is a little stronger...i may be a lush but im certainly not a whore---atleast not anymore...could i be that guy that could bring back that sparkle to you eye...im so afraid of failing that my attempts at contact seem vague and misleading...im like a baby, teething---ive got this pain inside...a great big whole, bright sun burning from my life...this life i no longer loathe...like when its your child you hold... i could be that man for whom you scan the crowded room for...i could be the one that leaves you always thirsting for more...i could be... everything

god@onemanout.com on friendster

my baby is my devil
tossed out, dimembered
a thought to remember
swollen from apetite
too empty to be bright
lodged my complaint
sinister saint
its cold and im tired
and i just dont know

explain way the rain
there's sunshine in spain
in cataluyna, far from roma
we can be...
...just be...

my angel's a devil
she carries me home
im too drunk to level
i wanna be stoned
with green eyes like absinthe
she talks slowly for me
i cant understand
i cant hardly speak

carry me away
to the sunshine of spain
with picasso blue, oh, and baby too
we can be...
...just be...

kewl shit

OUR UNIVERSE

a letter to the editor
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
a sour drift, a sour pen;
loose lips, looser then;
count once, count to ten;
and all these visions start again;

somebody hold me, somebody nail me to the floor;
got something to show me? got nothing but ive had it all before;

sad life at 21;
start now, live for fun;
take care, and take notes;
this life you have it is no joke;

somebody help me, somebody help me help some more;
got nothing to show for it? got nothing but ive had it all before...

too many dishes piled up
to make my favorite dinner
too many people all tied up
how could i become a winner...

too many secrets left untold
where's the ear to listen?
two bottles on the floor
couldnt help the distance...
i know...

so...

peaked out at 23
look right, then look at me;
top this, be better than i am
i am...

nobody saved me?, nobody's kissed me like that before;
dont care if i show it, got nothing that ive ever had before.

Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of March 22 through March 28

The Sun and Mercury are encouraging you to talk about your experiences, needs, and desires. What are your financial goals for the year ahead? If you haven't thought about any of this, then perhaps it is time to. You also need to think about where your relationship is going, as it has been changing a lot recently. Mars squares Uranus over the weekend, creating a rather reckless influence, so again don't do anything rash, especially where your career is concerned. Take a deep breath and stay calm.

"Society produces rogues, education makes one rogue cleverer than another"
~Oscar Wilde~

i told you, so...
he is thinking at this moment
as she buys another round
he hopes so has it coming
she is telling him goodbye
now hes drinking for a reason
and she knows the reason why...

so why'd you have to fuck him
if you couldnt make it home
so easy love forgotten
couldnt mean much after all

they laughed because its funny
he laughed for something to do
they mention it from time to time
he has another beer...

they didnt mind her showing
she didnt see them there
they took pictures i have seen 'em
she is laying on the table
the felt matches with her hair...

so is it re-occuring?
if so then nothing's there
but how could he forgive her
if shes couldnt care at all

~your words of love have changed~
under the moon-light; desert sand
under my shoe size; sizing up the Man
under a locked-key; broken my hand
undstand--under me--under you...

under the door-step; carved and ive bled
understood about half of what she said
underthings: laying under the bed
understand--under me--under you...

...tell me once more about it...
...tell me things that you do...
...tell my mother ive had sex...
...tell them all it was you...

under the blankets; still turning blue
under estimated by most of of you
underlings; savage see thru
understand--under me--under you...

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"The executive branch of the federal government has apparently enabled a lethal surprise attack with mass murder against two of the founding thirteen colonies, New York and Virginia. By such an act, the federal government would grossly violate and void its contract with the states, and abrogate its own constitutional rights and privileges. Even if you do not accept the complicity argument, it has failed to protect its largest city from the consequences of its overweening foreign policies.

Like a loose handgun, our Federal government has backfired on its owners, the States. The executive has gone to war in defiance of the Constitution, and Congress has abdicated its war-making authority on at least 200 occasions since 1945, according to the Federation of American Scientists. The federal government has proven utterly incapable and unwilling to remedy its chronic and world-threatening sickness "

It seems apropos to conclude: "if you are part of the problem, then you are not part of the solution." The solution then lies with the people themselves and not with any US government agency, least of all the Executive Branch."
---Nafeez Mosaddeq Ahmed, Executive Director of the Institute for Policy Research & Development, Brighton, England

Greetings Virgo
Here is your horoscope for the week of March 8 through March 14

Take extra care on Monday when Mercury, your ruling planet, makes a challenging aspect to Pluto. You might get much more than you bargained for, if you accidentally step on anyone's toes. There is the chance that your partner could let loose some deep-seated feelings that they've been bottling up. Take extra care, as even the slightest remark could have a devastating effect. Venus aspects Uranus on Tuesday, so if you get sent packing, you may find solace in a new friendship.

hold the phone

take a message; im all out of temptation; i put this off for way too long; cant feel my fingers; they told me im bleeding; somewhere down by the river; say that you see me; but your not even breathing; when can i wake from this nightmare im living...

the hole; swollen masses; they come without asking; the winter is passed and im not sure what im doing here...

fake for the foolish; elitist, stop drooling; im lost somewhere off in a song; a slight whisper tingling; the horror--that feeling; im down my the river tonite; say what your thinking; think you can break me; but im bright eyed and living a lie...

barely listening
shake your head
pretend you didnt see
the telephone ringing
and caller ID telling you its me...

wait...no...

im so much better in the un-typical way
i still bring you flowers; you still make my day
so whats the bother, where have i gone wrong
another bleeding heart of a romance already gone...

so what if i screwed it up; so what if my bowels bleed on a daily basis; so much blood and gore; aching heart an open sore; festering wounds that cannot get healed; everyday another layer gets peeled; backwards and forwards; surprising the lot of us; nothing but cowards and im locked in the trunk...

bob#1

Kucinich Supporter
Joined: 24 Feb 2004
Posts: 4 Posted: Mon Mar 01, 2004 1:38 am Post subject: House of the Falling Son

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

...i hear over and over how Baby Bush did 'such a great job' in the wake of 9/11...HE HID ON A [edited out] AIRPLANE AND DIDNT COME DOWN FOR 3 DAYS!!!!!!...while the rest of us looked to the sky to see if there were anymore planes barrelling down at us, he was LAUGHNG HIS [edited out] [hand] OFF in airforce one...shit, i wouldnt be surprised if he was on it PRIOR to the first strike!!!...

...i get lost in my own anger on this subject, so if i start rambling...sorry!

...point1) i know for a fact that the US government can read the license plate number off a speeding vehicle in real-time if it wants...HOW CAN SOMETHING AS BIG AS THE PLANS FOR ATTACKING THE US SLIP UNDER THE COLLECTIVE RADAR OF THE US GOVERNMENT???? ...we know also that {and this is applicable due to the media's own comparison of the 2 events} the plans for PEARL HARBOR were known WEEKS in advance, but FDR---knowing that his New Deal had failed and desperate to get America into WWII--- SAID NOTHING...not only had we already broken the Japanese codes but they sent an OFFICIAL ENVOY to the president demanding a cease to our embargo---an accepted Act of War according to the League of Nations...but what does that matter, we didnt join it, right?
...point2) Baby Bush WAS NEVER LEGALLY ELECTED!!! he lost, by last count, by some 6k votes DESPITE his brother expelling some 200k african-americans and old jewish women---ALL REGISTERED DEMOCRATS--- from the voter roll's

...



...the "PATRIOT" ACT took away 15% of the everyday american's civil liberties...WE ARE NO LONGER THE LAND OF THE FREE...we have succombed to our own stupidity...the government was allowed to effectively stereotype, disregard sanctity of person and property, eavesdrop....SPY ON ITS OWN POPULATION!!!!...we can no longer retaliate, protest, or argue against the government...the 3 things our founding fathers tried desperately to preserve for us...the right to bare arms was garunteed us so that we may raise up and put the federal government in its place if need be...we were told, no...ENCOURAGED to stage a coup de tat if we felt that the government was getting out of hand...and it has!...oh, i know the rhetoric about 'its better than anywhere else'...but so what...does that mean we should simply LET it go on out of hand...if a child steals, do you say "atleast he's not killing anyone today" and let him go on? ...besides, thanks to the PATRIOT Act...ITS NO BETTER THAN ANYWHERE ELSE!!!!! not anymore! we, the people of the united states of america are sworn to defend the constitution by all those pledges of alligence's we took in grade school...we are summoned by the founding fathers, by the blood shed by countless millions in defense of said constitution to do the same, only this time we must fight the government itself...we must slay the creature the federal government has become...for our fathers...for our childeren...



Eb
_________________
"society produces rogues; its education which make one rogue more clever than another...!" ~oscar wilde~

Back to top

:city by the bay:
...wouldnt you just figure...ive been talking and talking about moving to sf and just before i do...{drum roll}...i meet and get attracted/attatched to a grrrl that makes me want to re-consider my a-sexual ways... ...but thats the best part, we dont have to fret over the day-to-day boring "boy-grrrl" stuff...we just have a blast...its actually more akin to a playground friendship, forged in mud and fed by scraped knees and howling screams for mommy... ...so what do i do??? i give her the bird! \i|ii aye carumba! im fruggin' 're-tah-ded'!


admend.1: the saddest looking man on Lincoln with a cardboard sign that read simply, "Help" is the proud receiptent of a turkey burger, fries, and soda fromthis great deli on irving...way to go guy!

{a bold statement}

...its not always darkest just before dawn...have no idea where i am...i feel them out there in the dark...waiting to turn me into another media-feeding-frenzy-happy-meal to go...would you like to super size that for just 59 cents?!...there is always the edge i feel too, off to the left somewhere...dont know where it goes or to whom; but it may be my best choice soon...and all i need is a fucking hand/out in the cold...that little effort willingly put forward...step to the left...the edge is right there...and they're getting closer and closer...

...to be continued?

a shared IM
in the solace of a corporate wash-room; behind the locked doors of the last stall...probably the kewlest person i know gave this brief description of me {it would be conceeded of me to try to speak highly of myself in a bragging way and im told that i never do justice to myself}

"how would you describe me to someone {be nice, but honest} in a well rounded "summed up" kinda way?
GRRRL: hmmm independant eccentric deep..."
ME: "'wild rivers'-deep or marinara-trench?"
GRRRL: "red sea" GRRRL: "murky and mysterious"
ME: "i could be parted by a prophet :p ...to sum up?"
GRRRL: "persistant being, LIFE...LOVE....REGRET....to some complete chaos, others the chaos which makes him complete"

and all i could come up with was to call her my little bumble bee and quote a burnt-out hippie {sorry doc}...no matter what you attached the title to, you'll always be my lil chicken-of-habit...my habit

a private moment...broadcasted over the internet

a look at the sky and the warrior's in bloom
think to myself {still think of you}
couldnt we have shared this
couldnt you proved me wrong
made this something special
instead of being gone
a small bite that soon gone
a little tingling in my arm
the host is an itch
the substence is calm
my love is a bitch
my reaction bar none

and where in this passion flower
is the mighty love turned so sour
she sleeps without an after thought
no hiccup or burp
and yeah i still think that i am god
you never learn

so thank you to the painter of the sunrise
and the sunset and the sky
those hills touched with magic
the creek is beauty defined
all this i assume is for me
this world is mine

...tell you what...given some fair amount of time, all things become illogical...we either suppress this unadulterated truth in our sick demented personal concept of reality...or we never achieve the level of comprehension of an actual mature adult of the human gens...

...quick question:
anyone know exactly how many hours being awake straight-thru before one is clinically insane and can no longer be held accountable for ones own actions?

{like you joggers who run around, and round...}

there's this point i seek and its just out of reach
like the horizon it moves further away
but something tells me im somehow closer
that the end may be near
but The End, that final curtain call
no vision makes it clear
that may be the only end at all

{"mind warp..." "-infinity!"}
...as if in some vain attempt to erase the sky
threads of stratus clouds stretch towards the east
and the low mumbling wind starts a conversation with the trees
the sun retraces the stumbling-drunk footsteps of the moon
letting all who care to know or vaguely wonder
in matters of light and good manners
it is god and exerts its rule...
but for all its burning fierce vain--glory
it has not a strand of light thats conscience
does not know, cannot feel
does what it does and thats all that there is
...but the moon has its moods
and gets drunk all the time
with the faint glow of Big Brother bounced off in reflection
that wild, cantankerous moon, once drunk, will rebel against your standards
and hanging low in the late-day sky, smile in quite bemusement...as he has today...
and the great owl who hears his laughter
awakens too early from his own deep slumber
howling disapproval for the misleading humour and goes back under
that sleep which is desperately attempting to annex the world
...and late it the summer those clouds disappear
over horizons that never grow near...
on its bank sits the old man we know of as Time
...just as immortal/immoral as fate is blind...
that bitch of a wife of his who talks in her sleep...
hes running away but she stallks him like me
i just want to talk with him, ask what It means...

...are we some experiment in an 8th grade science fair 3rd prize?
or are they true, all those creationist theories?
god, or is it George?, did it all with a purpose in mind
if he didnt want me to question it than he shouldnt've put one in mine
this instant we concieve of as all that the is
this world in even our universe not much more than a blip
could be nothing more than a fart of some other exsistence
always get stuck in this line of thinking
on what defies my reasoning
that damnable but wonderful thing
we given the name of infinity

...but so what?
would understanding be gotten from seeing it there
if knowing doesnt bring reason; and who fuckin' cares!?
look with those portals to the world that you know
even if its just in yer head or a late-night cable-access show
its here and its beautiful and you must somehow try to live in it
worry about the other things if you survive yer own death...

{quote for the week}

If being an egomaniac means I believe in what I do and in my art or music, then in that respect you can call me that ... I believe in what I do, and Ill say it.
Author: John Lennon

never thought much of zambize

claw away at these straps of leather
sneak out to the night
never a thought or care for the weather
how you live is your right

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

dont need it now but now more than ever
for having a thing makes not needing it better

~~~~~~~~

demanding to know the forecast from a very stubborn wall
all told/ its not better/ said we'd be better off
taste murder in the back of my throat
for this need to love a girl
there's some hidden scar like a vegas marquee
1 time only and history, try to be original-try sticking around

Security

security...what does this word mean in relation to life as we know it today? for the most part, it means safety and freedom from worry. it is said to be the end that all men strive for; but is security a utopian goal or is it another word for 'rut?
let us visualize the secure man; and by this term, i mean a man who has settled for finacial and personal security for his goal in life. in general, he is a man who has pushed ambition and initiative aside and settled down, so to speak, in a boring, but safe and comfortable rut for the rest of his life. his future is but an extension of his present, and he accepts it as such with a complacent shrug of his shoulders. his ideas and ideals are those of society in general and he is accepted as a 'respectable', but average and prosaic man. but is he a man? has he any self-respect or pride in himself? how could he when he risked nothing and gained nothing? what does he think when he sees his youthful dreams of adventure, accomplishment, travel, and romance buried under the cloak of conformity? how does he feel when he realizes that he has barely tasted the meal of life; when he sees the prison he has made for himself in pursuit of the almighty dollar? if he thinks this is all well and good, but think of the tragedy of a man who has sacrificed his freedom on the alter of security, and wishes he could turn back the hands of time. a man is to be pitied who lacked the courage to accept the challenge of freedom and depart from the cushion of 'security' and see life as it is instead of living it second-hand. life has by-passed this man and he has watched from a secure place, afraid to seek anything better. what has he done except to sit and wait for the tomorrow which never comes?
turn back the pages of history and see the men who have shaped the destiny of the world. security was never theirs, but thye lived rather than 'exsisted'. where would the world be if all men sought security and had not taken risks or gambled with thier lives on the chance that, if they won, life would be different and richer? it is from the bystanders (who are in the vast majority) that we recieve the propaganda that life is not worth living, that life is a drudgery, that the ambitions of youth must be laid aside from a life which is but a painful wait for death. these are the ones who squeeze what excitement they can from a life out of imaginations and experiences of others through books and movies. these are the insignificant and forgotten men who preach conformity because it is all they know. these are the men who dream at night of what could have been, but wake at dawn to take their places in the now-familiar rut and to merely exsist through another day. for them, the romance of life is long dead and they are forced to go through the years on a tread-mill, cursing their exsistance, yet afraid to die because of the unknown which faces them after death. they lacked the only true courage: the kind which enables men to face the unknown regardless of the consequences.
as an after thought, it seems hardly proper to write of life without once mentioning happiness; so we shall let you, the reader, answer this question for your himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived, or he who has stayed "secure"-ly on shore and merely 'exsisted'?
-Hunter S. Thompson

...generated de-generate...
im at a loss and close to the edge
dirty the memory dont dirty the bed
feel i dont want to too soon to say
removed from the darkness removal of me
cognative lately and its too soon to tell
star revalation for a happy meal-
i
dont
think
so...

ive misplaced my hate
still fall in debate
i know you hate that dont you...
im all out of time
with reasons not mine
dont deny i ever loved you...
dont you
dont you...

competion runner ran for government
how could you forget her despite the medicine
i am really alright i am really aright i am really... :|

fuck you too, dad
im suddenly angry and i radiate heat
so blessed with the error i had to bleed
thank you for knowing but not about me
hungry words can shred your make-believe

salivate the chance; wounding first glance
toppeled more than this; i am...

having fun...
but i cant be more than this...

selective amniesia; so sure cant recall
rejoice if only provoked by us all
so easy to say 'its all your fault'
yesterday, or today-its the same despite it all...

purchased a brand new life; branded and despised
so, no its not just kicks; meanwhile i'm...

-c.

pointed at sunset
keep on heading west
might just get some rest
but iam...

-slow c.

and this one
i saw a breif glimpse of what could be
if i was what you thought of me
instead of what i am...
what am i?
higher than the dutch clog-maker we saw
pissed about a president who fucked with the vote
sorry about anything that was really my fault
waiting for my body to get with the program

//and you thought the other shit was depressing?\\
i never had excess; never been needed; a want for a moment; but lost in a second;
and these pictures of lost causes and what never lasts;
seemed i was a star but a min. ago...
package me nicely; linger on bait; always a fuck up; only one date;
need another worry like a new ulcer; couldnt she have waited until she took me home?

im stuck in the middle
between heaven and hell
one just ignores me
no matter how much i yell
the other adores me
and wont be disspelled

---i cant quite these voices inside of my brain...too many thoughts all at once...done with praying...gonna be done with it...make it a show...short breath and then go

momentary lapse in make-believe
"I can't believe I won. I was running against peace, prosperity, and {?forgot this one?}"
-G.W.Bush "president" of the us of a

"There is a squatter on federal property... A man not elected by the people is living in 1600 Pennsylvania Ave."
-Michael Moore, Stupid White Men

more americans have read/are reading Michael Moore's new book than voted for The Fraud In A Suit. and from a man walking away with an Oscar for his film Bowling for Columbine and (supposedly) bruises from his 'acceptance' speech, cut short on TV in blantent censorship. a man more psyched up on america then a NOS'd-out raver on 4 July. Moore's fact-recitation can be read for either side...but the facts are so unbelievable in themselves!...things our 15-minute minds have heard, maybe, but not retained. probably due to their incredibility. not-quite-finished reading it yet, but all ready im beyond bewilderment. what the fuck?!?

...something she said to me last...
sour at appearences; not really old but still you try and make believe
cafe was empty and she spoke of the last chance for me
the other world is telling me what i suspected along
best get me outta here; before i do something wrong...

...i must go to heaven
im already stuck in hell
and when id end up there
i'll ring the fucking bell...

distractions make it seem more normal
lying still in bed to half past 3
in the luxury of a 3-star rating
just the best for you baby
nothing but the best...
...for you

reset olafactory-settings?!?
been trying to feel. but i ain't got no legs. missed opportunities. acquired new taste. its better up here. where the air's not so thick. so tragic isn't it. the words that she said. baby doll queen. hopped on benny's. mixed quotes, and personalities. kinda feeling ill. dont know where this is going. something's gotta give. not good at bending. wait for the weekend. the fun it's all there. 24 bottles pending. earned every one. sent out a letter. got no reply. stand on a rooftop, arms to the sky. got a slight tingle in the corner of my mind. like an itch or a burning. still don't know why. better much better. arms all around. look ma', he's funny. but he isn't a clown. lost points and descriptions. curious jorge va a la playa. drown in a bathtub. cinco de mayo. danny-boy found the stairway. slammed the door shut. now its locked when i find it. i just cant get out.


Childhood: The period of human life intermediate between the idiocy of infancy
and the folly of youth -- two removes from the sin of manhood and three from the
remorse of age.
~Ambrose Bierce~

Disease Of the Month
phlebitis

Inflammation of the wall of a vein. Causes include nearby infection, trauma, surgery, and childbirth. The area over the vein is painful, swollen, red, and hot. A tender, cordlike mass may be felt under the skin. It usually occurs in surface veins in the lower leg and can be treated with pain relievers and bed rest, with mild exercise after inflammation subsides. Phlebitis can last for years; in such cases, irritation of the vein's inner lining leads to blood-clot formation, a condition known as thrombophlebitis (see thrombosis). In deeper veins, this requires anticoagulants to prevent embolisms.

wish it were real
make believe that this is real; jagged edge, tasty pill
sometime ago it was decided and cant turn back now
oh but to disappear comletely, only then make the real escape
stopping now solely for other peoples sake; sweet oblivion
to be rid of this failed life; bitter passions unreturned, lost love
that still burns; too much, cant bare it; not another day
i need to disappear completely, so i can be free...

honey, i think about it all the time
we're never safe when lites are low; begging your forgiveness;
but instant sanity wont take heed; these roots of madness run too deep;
and all the angels laugh at me...

another sleepless nite beside her; she cant drive when im sober;
another chance for destiny; hollow eyes that will not see;
breaking loose from conformity; and all the angels laugh...
at me...

dreaming is so close to shows
how could i be expected to know
this here reality that you see
and you're right here next to me...
wake up and those wound are real
experiment to make me feel
i dont know and i cant see
and you're right here next to me...

daylight
so quite
inside
two sides
tonite
i'll try to make it right

laying on a cement floor; i like to call my home;
visions of another life to call my own; instead of out here all alone;
she weeps but its not with sadness; she weeps quite openly;
she weeps because shes finally free;
and all the angels laugh at me...

awesome
etude n. Music
A piece composed for the development of a specific point of technique.
[from Old French estudie, study.]


***from mighty girl

punctuation, punctuation!
all i want is a red rider BB gun with a compass in the stock...

...and about 6lbs of good afghan hash.

nice!
saw an awesome sight...

a young man with Downs
listening to head phones
dancing his fucking heart away...

i like happy thoughts...

where's my lipstick?
not too fast, please forget about it
this isnt mine; no i dont think its hard to forget
drop from the outer mark
good at the finish, damned from the start

and i bet yer wonder what im gonna think...
got it all up here behind the kitchen sink...
yeah ive got it all...

back from the dead

flying high on an airplane again
cigarette shakes in my hand
i cant believe what They said...
told that damn lie again
told us a lie and it true
so played out for you
tear at the wires all the time
but it just keeps coming out...

can i drift with you tonite
on these could-be-clouds around me
would you tell her that i said its alright
alright...
alright now,
-

spent all last night
in the terminal-lounge
cant be held accountable.

quote of the week
"Well, if it was the best, so what?"
-john lennon

a billion and one uses
duct tape is listed in my Top 5 Greastest Inventions of All Time...here is but another reason why...


**dont wanna know where this is from

captured like fireflies
a dream without meaning
shot past the whirlpool
like space outta nowhere
back as a rebel
in one of mikey's poems
dare neglegt the baby tantrum
scolded high noon

dag nab it
i haven't been keeping up with my internet adventures well...just read that mighty girl is geting married...shit im depressed...

too funny...

You Know You're a Nova Scotian When:

1. Your Idea Of A Traffic Jam Is Ten Cars Waiting To Pass A Tractor On The Highway

2. "Vacation" Means Going To MonctonFor The Weekend.

3. You Measure Distance In Hours

4. You Know Several People Who Have Hit Deer More Than Once

5. You Often Switch From "Heat" To "A/C" In The Same Day

6. You Use A Down Comforter In The Summer

7. Your Grandparents Drive At 100 Km/H Through 13 Feet Of Snow During A
Raging Blizzard, Without Flinching.

8. You See People Wearing Hunting Clothes At Social Events

9. You Install Security Lights On Your House And Garage And Leave Both Unlocked

10. You Think Of The Major Food Groups As Deer Meat, Fish And Keith's

11. You Carry Jumper Cables In Your Car And Your Wife Knows How To Use Them

12. There Are 7 Empty Cars Running In The Parking Lot At The Canadian
Tire Store At Any Given Time

13. You Design Your Kids Halloween Costume To Fit Over A Snowsuit

14. Driving Is Better In The Winter Because The Potholes Are Filled With Snow

15. You Think Lingerie Is Tube Socks And Flannel Pajamas

16. You Know All 4 Seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Winter, And Construction

17. It Takes You 3 Hours To Go To The Store For One Item Even When
You're In A Hurry, Because You Have To Stop And Talk To Everyone In Town

And Finally, You Know You Live In Nova ScotiaWhen:

18. You Actually Understand These Jokes And Forward Them To All Your
Friends From Nova Scotia


...i wanna meet someone from nova scotia...

hazardous to your health
As a seventh grade student, Claire Nelson learned that di(ethylhexyl)adepate (DEHA), considered a carcinogen, is found in plastic wrap. She also learned that the FDA had never studied the effect of microwave cooking on plastic-wrapped food. Claire began to wonder: "Can cancer-causing particles seep into food covered with household plastic wrap while it is being microwaved?"

Three years later, with encouragement from her high school science teacher, Claire set out to test what the FDA had not. Although she had an idea for studying the effect of microwave radiation on plastic-wrapped food, she did not have the equipment. Eventually, Jon Wilkes at the National Center for Toxicological Research in Jefferson, Arkansas, agreed to help her. The research center, which is affiliated with the FDA, let her use its facilities to perform her experiments, which involved microwaving plastic wrap in virgin olive oil.

Claire tested four different plastic wraps and "found not just the carcinogens but also xenoestrogen was migrating [into the oil]...." Xenoestrogens are linked to low sperm counts in men and to breast cancer in women.

Throughout her junior and senior years, Claire made a couple of trips each week to the research center, which was 25 miles from her home, to work on her experiment. An article in Options reported that "her analysis found that DEHA was migrating into the oil at between 200 parts and 500 parts per million. The FDA standard is 0.05 parts per billion." Her summarized results have been published in science journals.

Claire Nelson received the American Chemical Society's top science prize for students during her junior year and fourth place at the International Science and Engineering Fair (Fort Worth, Texas) as a senior.

"Carcinogens -- At 10,000,000 Times FDA Limits" Options May 2000. Published by People Against Cancer, 515-972-4444.

On Channel 2 (Huntsville, AL) they had a Dr. Edward Fujimoto from Castle Hospital on the program. He is the manager of the Wellness Program at the hospital.

He was talking about dioxins and how bad they are for us. He said that we should not be heating our food in the microwave using plastic containers. This applies to foods that contain fat. He said that the combination of fat, high heat and plastics releases dioxins into the food and ultimately into the cells of the body. Dioxins are carcinogens and highly toxic to the cells of our bodies.

Instead, he recommends using glass, Corning Ware, or ceramic containers for heating food. You get the same results without the dioxins. So such things as TV dinners, instant saimin and soups, etc., should be REMOVED from their container and heated in something else. Paper isn't bad but you don't know what is in the paper. It is far safer to use tempered glass, Corning Ware, etc. He said we might remember when some of the fast food restaurants
moved away from the foam containers to paper.

The dioxin problem is one of the reasons.

yak!
"if theres nothing on the line, it don't mean anything"

**compliments of my roommate

end of year
its that time of year again...everyone goes back to school, off somewhere in the great blue yonder, and i stay...this is MY college town...

yippee!
if you live in SF, DC, or NYC (or visit there and get a ticket so that you curse the place forever), you now have a savior...

parking tickets dot com

**from the lovely kat (in SF)

mi amore
another spectalur article by the glorious Margaret Berry...meticulusly pointing out the obvious, or should be obvious and we all seem the convienently "forget"

Don't be Rude: Part II

calculated affair
i just watched my ex and my friend (whom she dated right afterward) verbally abuse each other...picture a porixide blonde and a cool grubby 30 something having it out...and me in the corner smoking laughing my ass off...untill they ask me something...do i agree? hey, man, leave me outta this one...don't worry dave, you won, hands down...

:)
life on prozac

Frisco
yesterday morning i emarked on a road trip to san fransisco, via sacramento. awesome drive. mustard hills and salemander skies. then SF. i fucking love that town. went out with kat and sean. got obscenely drunk. yakked going back over the bay bridge. fun, fun. this morning was berkely and smelly people. and an awesome shopping spree @ amoeba. then back home. i think i spent more time in the car then in the city, actually i know i did. but, what the fuck, right?

hiatus
things have been kinda slow since i got fired...i'm taking a sabbatical from working...been working fairly steadily since i was 14...time for a break...