[hot]
bashful, hot lover; caramel queen
mean what your saying and
say you want me
bent over backwards; both in heat
and in jest
figuratively-literally
at the foot of the bed
unlock the secrets with the hooks
of your dress
whole body beating and
clenched tight as a drum
drenched in sweat; as if swimming
each breath biting in lungs
exhaled past your voice box
which brings music to my ears
the sound of your moaning
the taste of your tears
wild and spinning; the earth moves in sway
to the pushing and pulling between you
and me
is this how you see it?
tell me, now,
does it feel good?
my minds eye is harlot,
my brain is a whore

...c-span2 update...
a bunch of politicians deliberating for hours
about who would be politically appropriate to
nominate
for the various Nobel Prizes...

[what?!?]
well, just answer me one question
what is it you love?
the tired faces filling up
tired days
like a skipping record
's been skipping since 10-years-ago
when push comes to shove, tell me
what is it you love?!?
i doubt even you know!
your emotions, your tools
you use
in your game. applied with
the pressure
of your ultimate aim

[drink the honey from my lips]
yellow transmittals of blank, empty
space; sent for cause of reaction
that screams for attention. well, sorry
honey; not today.

[what you say]
i taste the ill-famed apple-
of-your-eye that tasted
a little bit like strawberries.
but i havent had any strawberries,
not for a year at least.
the daylight, i think, hates me
because im handsom, says his inner
drag-queen.
put me in a magazine.
i could be in a magazine,
maybe if i was seventeen
again.
so what if all thats good is rotten
so what if i dont care
apathy is all love's begotten
guess that means i care

[bold]
can you feel the hunger?
is it deafening?
your stomach growl
a freight train
long & hot on a still dead night
the anxiety in waiting
between a rumble & a roar

[down by the river]
beat me down when i was standing
tall
left me bloody down by the river
if that river could carry me away
wash this body clean
if i thought for a second
id let that river take me
down o the ocean - way out to sea
goddamn these emotions,
they're killing me!

[...]
tremble, you shake
til the night turns to dawn
all the reasons you made
up
are all old, dead & gone
trying being fruitless
& selling your time
they dont want a person
& they sure as hell dont want
your mind

[post]
the stench of sex stains
innocense;
the jagged tooth stuck in
my heart.
i could have been...
something,
but i fell down & couldnt get
back up

[bottom feeder]
every fibre in my body
every morsel of my soul
screams at me out loud from want
of something
i guess
i dont know...
form eloquent & quite useless words
thru my chapped lips & with no real point
to the empty walls of my room & board
for something
i guess
i dont know...

i once had a head and i
loved it too much
it would beg
to be fed & i
loved it too much
i would take it out & i
would tease it with touch
it loved to be played with
& i loved to play with it
& i
im afraid i
loved it too much

[mediocre attempt]
what do you want from me?
please tell me
specificly{sp?}
im not an idol to be worshipped
im not an ideal to be held
tho i do like to cuddle when
my mind starts to swell
my passion lays inside of that mind
its not very obvious and not very
kind
to others who try
like hell sometimes
but just see me as blind
over pretensions and
ALL
absolute's
but i wouldnt mind a shot
or two
with a little vermouth
it could clean me like the morning
sun
when i woke up
to me
alone

[stranger still]
the cat lies in direct sunlight
while i hide my face in a shadow
you treat me with your words
in quotations
as if you want to say something
well, then
say something
i can give and give
im quite capable of that
but whats the point
everyone walks away

[words are like daggers]
truely i am sorry if my words i sent to hurt you
found there mark and drove it home
with the point of my heart

[sober,what?]
so much for good tuesdays, things quickly turned bad
and you wouldnt surrender, on top of all that
she told me a story. i made it my life.
when she got all self-righteous.
i knew i was right.
so i came here this evening, cashed check & broke heart
to tell you im leaving - but just to my car.
somebody someday should tell me
what i dont want to know.
ive got no more to say to ya, baby
i gotta go.
i gotta go.
she told me how her friends say she should leave me to die
well she did and she didnt, depends from which side
she wronged me so often, but its easy to start
from the first lie she told me
when i gave her my heart.
so im drinking my whiskey; but i still miss your kiss
maybe someone will miss me...and find me like this
and just maybe they'll tell me
what i dont want to know
ive got no more to say to ya, baby
i gotta go.
yeah, i gotta go.

[polaroid]
drawn through the eyes of an old faded picture
wrapped in the gown of a stale wooden dream
i think that i saw -somewhere high above greenland
a reflection of someone quite alien to me
the thousands of roads ive been told would be open
to me
all of them blocked, successfuly -im in
quarentine!-
and im getting quite dizzy
from this constantly spinning
around & around & around & around...

referandum 'b'
im working hard on this problem,
dear. and im menatlly digesting
all of it. or, maybe im just plain
mental. but,
repeatedly you've spoken
about this glorious, long-lost
past.
just after we had first met and
for a while after that.
but i keep dodging some point
that thing that you speak of
so i thought that i might
just
try telling you why
i dont want to go backwards like
a drunken parade
this time that you talk so
enamorously about
at great lengths
while the words spin me round
disorienting me.
was when i had to
each morning
tell myself in the mirror
"dont get too attached"
due to all of the crap surrounding you
a rival lover
a troubled soul
a spotted past
-all of the 'crap'
this picture-perfect honeymoon-scene
you describe to me
when rattled out of MY memory
is when my heart was just mine
& nobody else's
you kept saying
"its okay. its love."& "just trust it."
and i was drowned in the waves of
a strongly felt passion
i was so goddamn afraid
---no, no; i was
terrified!
but you said
"its alright its alright its all right"
babe
and i
i believed in your freckled eyes
i gave myself fully
to
trust-love-believing.
okay so that thread was cut
by you
i am very aware of the
silly things people do.
but i cant carry on till this thread has been
mended.
and my trust is renewed
in you.
and my feeling have been tended
to.
im trying hard to hold on
way beyond
what most people say i should do
too!
help me
baby
PLEASE!!!
trust in me like i trust in you
trust in me
and from this baggage we'll be
free.

...shimmering light thru this darkness
by chance---
caught on a dew drop & cascaded down
like every one that still clings
to the rose in my hand...

[//:xmit v.2]
eyes of a seraphim
-shes a devil that one!
the path she leads me down
ive been down before
but, oh, that cherubic-baby-face!
-shes a devil that one!
she loves; gives me poison
she poisons my son
Arch-Angel---HEAVENLY BODY!!!
shes some kind of devil, that one!
if she knocked my front teeth in
it might make me cum!

[titans]
who is truth? where's honesty?
neither will run for the Presidency
fancy dressed marionettes
what we get instead
'how does this matter?'
cried, aloud, the Mad-Hatter
truth hides in shame because honesty got splattered
where has all the good deeds gone, un-rewarded
got stuck in a bi-partisan committee & thwarted
fools that sway almost any way
'think what i mean, not what i say!'
they even shot integrity
cant have that in the Presidency

[sometimes i get to be too much]
im sorry---so sorry, dear
i sometimes feel let down and i
succumb to this, The Fear
i kick and scream and curse and fight
atleast for the better part of the
first part of the night
meanwhile, later, it all seems so clear

yes, im trying to control these
wild outbursts of feelings of mine
with all these pills, all this whiskey
all this wine

[ill]
im sick in my soul
like im constantly dying
day in & day out
and even after 26 years, it
still hurts THAT BAD!
so that, i am paralysed.
with a faint shrug &
a sigh; i-
lock it all away
from you, the world at large.
i bow to make ready for my
emergency escape
"thank you & goodnight!"
i hear myself say
out loud
second door,
stage right.

[otra ves]
the night brought me mixed drinks
and feelings plenty. dined on the
atmosphere & the sure things
that we re there. a push in
the right direction, the
satisfaction of
my obsession.
left dangerously open, lying naked
like that. & the sight of your heart
makes me sad. never more than a
good idea anyway. just a thought.
as if wants could happen
& i'd be happy.

[woe is me part XXIII]
the familiar feeling of solitude
that ive nourished & delt with since i was
a young man
i ve thrown her out before
that i should find myself a partner
supposing i wanted more than just this
life of filthy words & the
private conversations that i keep
to myself
only to find i fail, like always
yes, its always me
my fault, my discrepency
my lack of heart
despite my holding it out for all the world to see!
i did the wrong
i fucked it up
& i am the one who goes now
off to be alone

[jungle rumble]
on a cozy concrete rooftop
above a busy city street
i watch the masses stirring about & all around
like busy little bee's
& when their paths cross or
intersect, in a multitude of ways
the abstracted flushed emotions
that everyone displays
they either:
laugh or cry
huf or fight
depending on some things
so i got down off that rooftop
it never was really mine
determined that i should find
the peculiarities that compose
the various human minds